Chapter 121

Rachel POV

Our Blessed Goddess Medical Center- Surgical Waiting Room Floor 3

"Do you think he'll be able to help? Save Ethan, I mean?"

My words came out mumbled and murmured because my lips felt numb.

Honestly, the numbness was spreading from my lips to my cheeks, my scalp, down my neck, and on and on until I felt as if I were an ice sculpture frozen in place by nameless fear. A ringing sound was echoing in my ears and only got louder the longer it took to get a reply.

Both Alphas with me seemed to want to do anything other than speak to me; Lindy Campbell was silently crying while clutching Nathan's hand with both hers as if she could hold him in place if she only tried hard enough.

I realized I wanted to slap the girl only when Tyler squeezed my wrist.

I didn't even remember raising my hand. All I could think about were the words 'extraordinary measures' and how Art Windsor was gone off to play savior for my brother while I was able to do nothing.

Why was this happening to us? Why was our family being singled out for so much heartache?

"You can let me go," I muttered, licking my lips to try to coax feeling back into them, "I'm not going to do anything. I just---I don't know what I was thinking. I want Ethan to be okay. I want this to be over. I just want it all to be over."

Exhaustion swept over me with the force of a wave crashing into the shore at high tide. I swayed on my feet only once before Tyler released my arm to haul me up into a bridal carry. I would never get used to how big and strong he was or how small and dainty he made me feel.

"You need to go home. Being here has exhausted you. Think about what the doctor said: you need to be careful."

I knew Tyler was worried about our daughter -I was too- but I couldn't give up on Ethan.

"I can't leave. I can't."

Leaving the hospital would be the same as admitting Ethan wasn't going to survive to leave alive.

Tyler wouldn't understand because he didn't have the same relationship with his siblings I had with mine or maybe because I wasn't explaining the situation right. Some of our arguments were the result of miscommunication; I knew some of those misunderstandings could be laid at my feet.

"If I leave, I'm giving up on him, Tyler."

I shook my head, desperately trying to find a way to explain the feelings which were overwhelming me in the moment.

"Ethan has to get better and I have to be here when he is so he doesn't wake up alone. I'd never let him wake up alone."

Our mother had died while we were sleeping. No one had awoken us to say a final goodbye. We'd both been children at the time so I thought my father wanted us to be spared seeing her slip away, but it had left a scar on me, in me, and I couldn't ignore my need to avoid the same pain happening again with my brother.

"Fine. We stay. But. You have to be patient. Sit down and let me take care of you. Can you do that?"

I couldn't help melting a little at the thought my Alpha mate wanted to protect me even from worry. We were in the hospital. Surely Tyler knew nothing could happen in the hospital we wouldn't be able to handle.

Smiling, I nodded, "Yes. I can do that. You just better not complain when I ask you to get me more ice water every few minutes. I feel like I'm dying of thirst these days."

No one had mentioned all the strange little moments I would experience during pregnancy. I had known I'd be swollen, gain weight, and have to seek the bathroom more often, but I hadn't known about the thirst, the strange hunger pangs, or the flashes of emotion which would leave me feeling wrung out afterward.

Tyler would deserve a medal after dealing with me for my whole pregnancy.

If he could deal with me for the whole pregnancy.

I wasn't sure Tyler would continue to want me. A part of me worried he would wake up to realize I was still the woman who had lied to him in the beginning of our mating.

I knew I had offered him a thousand apologies already for my deceit, but I also knew I'd offer him a thousand more if we could salvage our mating.

I had never known how good a completed mate bond would feel.

Tyler and I shared emotions through the bond. I could sense his feelings the way he could sense mine. I could even tell a bit of what he was thinking though I definitely could not read his mind.

"Are you going to carry me the rest of the time we're here or can you put me down now?"

I was mostly joking. Being held by my mate was no hardship for me; I actually enjoyed being able to take the weight off my swollen feet for a while.

Feeling the hard wall of muscles making up Tyler's chest didn't hurt either. Who could blame me for thinking my mate was sexy? He was all man in a way which complimented my own femininity, making me feel more womanly just being close to him.

"I'm not sure. For right now, how about we both sit down and we send Lewis to fetch water?"

Nathan cast a glare at Tyler before going to leave. I saw him realize Lindy was still clinging to him at the same time I did.

Everyone looked at the Campbell girl, but she didn't make any move to release Nathan. I had a feeling it would take a Herculean effort to get Lindy to let Nathan go and I wasn't sure how I felt about the realization.

On one hand, I was grateful Nathan had found his fated mate. He deserved happiness. I couldn't give it to him no matter how much he insisted I could. Lindy would be perfect for him in so many ways---

Did I really feel jealous Nathan had found his mate? Did I really want him to keep wanting me even after we'd both come to understand we shared a past yet we didn't share a future?

"I guess we'll be back with water. If any new information comes, I have my phone on."

"You're only going to the cafeteria, Nathan. It's three floors down not three hours away."

Nathan sent a glare to me this time and I found I couldn't help smiling at him.

My emotions were all over the place and seeing Nathan react as he would have when we were teens was both comical and comforting at once.

"Fine! I'll call you if Art appears to tell me how he's saved the day this time."

Nathan left with Lindy in tow---leaving me alone in the surgical waiting area with Tyler.

Tyler surprised me by asking, "What can I do for you?"

"All I really want is some ice water. Nathan will be back soon. Tyler---I didn't mean to imply you cared less for your brother than I do for mine. I don't know very much about your relationship with your family. We've never talked," I saw frustration creeping over Tyler's features and hurried to say, "About your family. We've never talked about your family."

"My family isn't your problem."

There was the Tyler Wright I was used to dealing with: a cold Alpha whose word was law and whose will would not bend for anyone.

This Tyler Wright didn't need my love or approval or possibly me at all. He was whole all by himself and I was terrified I would find myself mated to him with such different needs existing between us.

"Do you think my family is your problem?"

I thought I could possibly turn the conversation around if I showed him how it felt to be told my mate had personal battles to fight I wasn't even welcomed to watch from the sidelines.

"Don't be ridiculous, Rachel. We aren't talking about the same situation at all."

"How are our situations different, Tyler? You're here with me for my brother Ethan. Why can't I be there for you for your brother William? Why can't I help you with your sister? Your father? Your mother? I don't even know the most basic things about your mother and she's still alive, Tyler! She's out there just separated from you by miles when my mother is gone forever from this life."

Tyler stood up and clenched his fists at his sides before visibly relaxing his hands. I could practically feel him dragging a deep breath into his lungs before he finally found the words he wanted to say to me.

"Art will be back soon to tell us how he's saved the day. I'm going to take a walk. Wait on Lewis to get back with your water and Art to come play savior, yes? Promise me you'll stay here?"

I nodded even though I wanted to beg him to stay, to talk to me, not to leave me alone with my thoughts.

Tyler walked out of the waiting room, taking my best hopes for our future with him and leaving uncertainty about everything in our lives in its place.