Chapter 2 Chapter 2

“You think you can disappear and come into our lives like you’re forgiven?” he says.

My heart clenches, and he continues, “You never called, and when we did visit, you’d never act like you were happy to see us,” he spits.

His brown eyes hold anger.

“When you left, Mum and Quinn cried nonstop. Faye stopped being herself. Even Dad had it difficult. You caused a lot of pain, Odetta, and they might have forgiven you, but I haven’t,” he says and leaves.

Tears roll down my cheeks. “I’m sorry. I—I didn’t mean to cause anyone harm,” I say as Mum comes to hug me.

“I don’t deserve to be here,” I mutter and wipe my tears.

“Nonsense. No matter what happens, you’re my daughter and you deserve to be here,” Dad says. “I can talk to Noel.”

“No, please.”

“You shouldn’t, Dad. It’s between Noel and Odetta,” Faye mutters.

“I’m so sorry, but he was excited that you’d be back,” Alia says with a confused expression.

“No, it’s okay. It’s not your fault.”

“I hope this hasn’t severed our relationship.”

I smile at her. “No, it hasn’t.”

“Noel talked about how we were when you left, but I think he had it worse than any of us here. He’s your twin brother and best friend, isn’t he?” Faye says.

“So you need to talk to him,” Quinn continues. “He loves you, but he’s hurt by everything.”

I just nod.

“He’ll be over by the pond,” Alia says.

I start making my way there. My mind races with what to say to him as I pass the beautiful trees.

“And make sure to be back by six,” I hear Mum call out behind me.

I find Noel sitting by the pond, deep in thought, so I quietly walk over and sit beside him. The silence stretches for a few seconds before he speaks.

“You didn’t call,” he simply says.

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry isn’t enough.”

“I know, and I’m—” I start to say but trail off.

“Sorry?” He scoffs.

I don’t say anything, and he continues, “If Mason just walks over to you and says he’s sorry for the pain he’s caused you, do you think it’ll make a difference?”

Tears slide down my cheeks. I want to scream at him for mentioning his name, but I can’t—he has a point.

“No, it won’t,” I say lowly.

“So you know how I feel?”

“Yes.”

“Wrong,” he says harshly. “I’m your twin brother, Odetta. We made a promise to be best friends forever, and do you know what best friends do? Talk. And when it gets tough and you’re hurting, you don’t talk to me. You just pack your bags and you’re off.”

The harshness in his voice is laced with sadness.

“I was—I’m still in pain. My heart hurts just thinking about him.”

He turns to me with hurt in his eyes. “You could’ve told me, talked to me at least. You could’ve shared your pain with me, but you held it in, and when it became too much for you, you left.”

“I just couldn’t stay. It was so painful.” I sob into my palms.

There’s more silence before he speaks.

“I know.”

His voice is softer now, and he scoots closer to me.

“I’ve never been rejected, so I don’t know how you feel, but after you left, I think I got a small feeling of it. You shut us out, Ody. That hurt us so much. And I was left punishing myself for not being the best brother, for not being there for you, wondering what I could’ve—should’ve done.”

I raise my head from my palms and lean into his shoulder.

“It wasn’t your fault.” I shake my head. “You couldn’t force me to confide in you.”

“I felt horrible. I waited by my phone for weeks for your call, but you never did, and when we visited, you acted like we were adding to your burden. The last thing any of us wanted to do was make your life more miserable.”

“I’m so sorry I made you feel that way.”

He takes a deep breath. “It’s okay.”

“I’m also sorry that I shunned you.”

After a few seconds of silence, he sighs.

“I’m sorry,” he starts to say. “I screamed a lot just now, even though everything wasn’t your fault. I don’t want to make you feel shitty. Ever.”

“Do you still want to talk about it? I’m here now, and I want to listen to you,” he asks uncertainly.

My heartbeat races.

“You might see him today, and maybe you talking will help, but it’s been four years, so maybe it’s o—”

I cut him off.

“It’s been seven years, and I still think of what would have been if he hadn’t picked Alexa.”

“Would we be married? Would we have children? Where would we be living? Sometimes I sit and wonder what he and Alexa are doing at this moment or what we could’ve been doing if he had ended up with me.”

“I punish myself with the thought of not being good enough. I wonder if being with Alexa makes him happier than the times we spent together. I wonder if he has a mate bond with Alexa now or if he has children.”

“He moved on seven years ago, and here I am still crying over him, and when I’m done thinking of what could’ve been, I think of how pathetic I am to still bother myself with him, and then I cry all over again.”

I’m crying so hard that tears are clouding my vision.

Noel’s arms are around me, rubbing my back soothingly. I cling to him and bury my face in his chest.

“Sometimes…” I continue, feeling so pathetically sad, “I wonder if he thinks of me, which must be impossible with the luxury life I’m sure he’s living with Alexa. I replay all the times we’ve been together in my head. Sometimes I look at his pictures, watch his favorite movie, or eat his favorite food and wonder if they’re still his favorites anymore.”

“Sometimes, I wonder what went on in his head when he chose Alexa or if he felt pain when he rejected me. I wonder why he did it, and sometimes I just write letters to him, but I don’t post them because I don’t want him knowing that he still affects me.”

“That bastard,” Noel growls.

“Sometimes I cry myself to sleep with thoughts of him. I feel so pathetic at times, but I can’t stop loving him. It’s been almost a decade, and he still invades my thoughts while he has another woman. What do you do when the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally for the rest of your life decides they don’t love you anymore?”

My voice breaks during my confession.

“It hurts so much. W-we were supposed to spend the rest of our lives loving each other, so why did he choose her?”

Noel stays quiet through it all except for a few curses here and there.

“I really wish I could have been there with you earlier. If you feel like this now, I can only imagine how much pain you felt years ago,” he murmurs and kisses my forehead as we stare out at the pond.

I nod. “It’s not your fault,” I mutter softly and cough lightly to ease my scratchy, dry throat.

“But that was a lot. It hurts to see you crying this much.”

“Seven years’ worth of emotions,” I reply and silently pray for a cup of water to appear.

“And you know what?” I whisper so low that I’m surprised he even heard me.

“What?”

“I never told anyone this, but after he rejected me, something happened to my wolf. I haven’t felt her in a long time. Maybe she’s trying to heal also.”

“What do you mean?”

He turns to look down at me.

“I mean, I haven’t felt her presence. I think the rejected bond being severed did something to her. I didn’t want to say anything and worry everyone.”

“That’s really serious, Ody. I wish you told us sooner.” He continues, “Can you really not feel her?”

“No.”

“I’ll have to talk to Dad about this.”

I stop him. “You can’t do that. This is just between us. I don’t want anyone to know. Whatever this is, I can take care of it myself. I don’t want anyone to worry about me.”

He looks like he wants to protest, but he sighs.

“He really is a bastard, and to think that I was his friend,” Noel says, and I feel his arm tighten around me.

“I need water.”

“Let’s go back before they think that I murdered you,” he says, but I shake my head.

“I’m a horrible, ugly mess. I’ll just scare them.”

He chuckles softly, and I inhale his scent and relax. I missed this—hugging Noel, having him hold me, having him take care of me.

“I really did miss you and all our fun together.”

“I missed you too.”

“You’re my second half, and I can’t lose you again. If anything happens, promise to tell me. I want you to know that no matter what happens, as long as you live, you’ll never be alone because I’m here.”

I smile at him and nod my head.

“I really think we should go back.”

This time, I don’t oppose. I just let him pull me up, and we make our way to the castle.

“How did you meet Alia?”

“Dad took me for a meeting with the Golden Moon pack, and I remember after the meeting I smelled something good,” he recalls with a smile.

“Then I had to follow the scent. It led me to a redheaded girl eating her hamburger like it was the only thing in the world. To others, it looked disgusting, but that was the sexiest thing I had ever seen,” he continues. “I knew I had to have her, and when we locked gazes, it was only her in the room, but the first thing she said to me was, ‘I’m sure I look like shit eating this, but I promise I’m lovely when I’m not eating.’”

He laughs.

“She was the Beta’s daughter, and she came with us that day because she didn’t want to wait another second without her mate.”

He sighs and continues, “You could imagine how touchy Mum got with her. Dad accepted her right away. Quinn was quick to bond with her, while it took Faye some time to accept her. All Alia needed to do was cook her favorite meal, and now Faye loves her.”

“When did you find her?”

“About…” He hums as he tries to remember. “Seven months ago. We tried calling to tell you, but you didn’t answer any of your calls. She was hurt at first, so I had to fill the void with amazing stories of you. She loved you before she finally got to see you.”

My heart sinks at his words. “Again, I’m so sorry,” I whisper.

“You were dealing with your demons too. If anyone needs to be sorry, it’s that bastard.”

We enter the castle where maids and servants smile and greet me as I pass.

“I was honestly so convinced that you wouldn’t come this week.”

“I wanted to come, to tell everyone that our family is still together.”

“Everyone is going to be so shocked because you haven’t been around for a while, and some people have their suspicions. Dad made it clear that you and your whereabouts were no one’s business. That shut down the nosy ones fast.”

We laugh at that. That sounds like Dad. Blunt and no-nonsense.

“I’m not really looking forward to tonight, but I hope I can get through it without breaking down.”

Noel squeezes my hand to offer comfort.

We climb up the stairs and enter the castle, where we see Mum standing and giving directions.

“Oh, there you are,” Mum says as she runs down the stairs in a haste. “The other Alphas are arriving, and you need to dress up and be ready by eight.”

“Relax, Mum. It’s only four p.m.”

“You know I can’t relax. And when you’re done with Odetta, please come help me welcome the rest.”

“No problem.”

“No, Peter, those are not the sheets for Alpha Maddox,” Mum exclaims as she runs past us to the servant.

We watch her collect the sheets from Peter and march down the stairs herself.

That’s my mother alright.

“Are we safe during this?”

“Things have changed since you were last here. We stay in the west wing, and it has been rebuilt. The layout is a bit different now. You can get lost, so be careful, okay?” He continues, “No one really knows the wing well enough since it’s relatively new and kind of private now. There are a lot of guards guarding the entrance, and only permitted people may enter the wing.”

I sigh in relief. Before I left, other Alphas stayed in a mansion at the outskirts of the property, but I guess this arrangement is better and more convenient.

We walk for two minutes before we pass the guards at the entrance of the west wing.

“The west wing dining room, the west wing sitting room,” he says as we pass some doors. It’s been a long time since I’ve visited, and everything seems new. “This is your room.”

He opens the door, and we step in.

It’s green with a queen-sized bed, closet, drawers, a flat-screen TV, and an expansive bathroom. There is also a bookshelf, a couch, a center table, a coffee table, and a balcony.

“Do you like it?”

“It’s amazing,” I say breathlessly.

“I still need that cup of water.”

“I’ll get it,” he says and opens the door to leave. “Remember, my room is just opposite yours if you need anything. And you know where everyone else is?”

“I know. Thanks,” I mutter.

“Remember to get ready by eight.”